“It’s the best of times and it’s the worst of times, because it’s the most of times. And you get to choose which part to experience.”
This powerful quote by Abraham-Hicks captures perfectly the double-edged nature of social media. While they give spiritual teachers like you and me the power to share our message with more people, they also give our ego a whole new array of ways to trap, and make us feel unworthy and inadequate.
Following the popularity of last week’s blog with Comparison Coach Lucy Sheridan, 7 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other Spiritual Teachers, I asked Lucy the two million-dollar questions around social media, self-worth, and spirituality:
There are so many brilliant spiritual teachers and coaches-in-the-making who are discouraged from showing up for their life purpose because they don’t have as big of a social media following as more established teachers. Why is our sense of self-worth tied to these numbers?
Comparing ourselves to other people whether it is their social media numbers, course content, lead message, events or perceived friendship groups acts as a big disconnector – from each other and ourselves. Social media numbers are what our ego will equate to more popularity, likeability and influence that we might feel we can emulate.
If we start to see a like or follow as a vote of coolness or confidence then it means we will need those numbers to increase, in order to keep chasing the validity we seek. It is another of our ego’s favourite ways to keep us safe by creating the impression that we are small.
Social media can give us each an impression we have our own fame bubble, and that in order to ‘be seen’ we need to curate and cultivate a persona, to build followers to hear our message. Sometimes this can take our focus away from what we really need to do, which is work on ourselves, remain faithful to our calling and be authentic in our voice.
Although I am not a fan or being led by rationality all the time 😉 it stands to reason that if someone is well known, established and has been working hard to teach and serve others with their message for years and years, and you just started your blog, of course they are going to have a bigger following than you!
Your challenge as a next generation teacher is to see past the numbers – they will come eventually and that is guaranteed – and to focus on how to be of service for the highest good. We are here to help people up close and in person as well as online, so it’s time we start to make the numbers work for us; not the other way round.
What does our worth and value as coaches and spiritual teachers really depend on?
Your worth and value are absolutely based on the positive impact you make in your clients’ life and your ability to be authentic.
Although it is difficult to quantify, it is certainly easy to spot and measure your worth and value – it will shine through every time you let the client speak uninterrupted so they can talk their issue all the way through, every time you get a ‘thank you’ email or text, every referral you receive in your business, the belly laughs you share with a client who could barely look up from the floor when you first met, the goals you see them smash, the healing that they go through and the progress they make in leaps or baby steps. If you have a part to play you are doing the real work you were called to do!
Your value will also be closely linked with your ability to be real and demonstrate how your own path is a work in progress – be the light, as perfectly imperfect as that may be.
Lucy Sheridan is the UK’s first ‘Comparison Coach’ and she’s on a mission to help people live #comparisonfree. Lucy helps Gen Y get over the ‘compare & despair’ of social media and recognise the ‘filter factor’ to focus on their lives OFF line and be happy on their own terms. Lucy is also the co-author of #HigherSelfie: Wake Up Your Life. Free Your Soul. Find Your Tribe published by Hay House April 2016. Learn more about Lucy at www.proofcoaching.com