Eleven years ago I was on the floor of my room crying, holding a bunch of pills, and ready to end my life. This was the climax of two years of self-loathing and criticising later, trying to cure myself from the disease that I thought homosexuality was.
Thankfully, at my darkest hour I had an epiphany. A voice within told me to simply stop giving a fuck about what other people thought about me, and be willing to start loving and accepting myself. I had no clue how I’d do that, but I knew that the voice that saved me would guide the way.
Shortly after my epiphany I was led on a spiritual path of healing and personal transformation. Tools, books, and spiritual teachers popped up everywhere in my life, giving me different ways that I’d use to heal the wounds that I had inflicted in me.
Louise Hay was among the first teachers that popped up, and she proved to be one of the biggest influences in my journey.
I still remember the day I came upon her classic explanation of how positive affirmations worked. In her bestselling book You Can Heal Your Life, Louise explained that affirmations are like seeds. You plant them by creating them, you water them through repetition, and then they grow into beautiful flowers, changing your life.
Although I didn’t fully understand how that worked, it felt true, and I decided to give it a try. The following day I went online and purchased Louise’s affirmations CD 101 Power Thoughts. As soon as I played the first few minutes I was hooked!
For the following year I listened to that one-hour recording every single day. I listened to it while driving to work, at work, and before I went to bed at night. I even wrote down my favourite affirmations on post-its and stuck them on the walls all around the house, the bathroom mirror, my computer screen, even the windshield of my car.
I became obsessed with that CD. To this day, if you play me any part of the recording I’m able to recite exactly what Louise says. Yes, I’ve memorised the entire thing, too!
A year of listening and affirming later I noticed something strange happening. The affirmations became so embedded in my subconscious that they started playing out in real life. “I’m in the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing” was no longer a far-fetched dream of mine, and the untouchable “I love and accept myself” seemed like an ordinary, natural thing to say!
When I made this realisation I had to stop and take it in, as it all seemed to have happened so effortlessly. Yes, doing the affirmations brought up fears, frustrations, and resentments that I worked hard to heal and release, but having Louise’s positive words affirming that, “Everything unfolds at the perfect time when I’m ready,” made this healing journey much easier than it would’ve been.
Looking back on my life now, where I’ve been and where I’ve come, I can honestly say that Louise Hay’s work has not only changed, but has saved my life. The story I’ve just shared is just a fraction of how Louise’s work has helped me heal and grow over the years, and I always go back to that same recording that started it all when I lose my way, to remind myself that, “Life is really simple” and that “All is well.”